Tonight there is a $75,000 a person dinner with Mitt Romney at the home of the president of the New England Patriots, Jonathan Kraft. How do I know this? Because my still registered-as-a-Republican husband got an e-mail invite from a former coworker.
Just $75,000? Let check the change in the couch and see what we can come up with. Oh! Only $74,999.99 short! Maybe we should raid the kids’ piggy banks.
I suggested we send my sister, the uber feminist, bleeding heart liberal poli sci professor (she may dispute that description, but I’m letting it stand as poetic license).
Adam one-upped me. He suggested sending the Tweedle Twirp. In a Miami Dolphins jersey.
Brilliant. I called the Tweedle Twirp to let her in on our plan. If I could find $74,999.99 more dollars, would she go? Yes! But the catch is she had a meeting at her school–in New York–until 3:30, so we’d have to hire her a private plane.
Sigh. It was such a good idea.
Of course, Adam pointed out, “I can’t imagine, ever, in life, spending $75k for a dinner.”
I asked, “But 50k would be okay?”
He said, “50k only if it’s a unicorn BBQ. Because those are pretty rare.”
Yet, when I pointed out that the Tweedle Twirp, in a Dolphins jersey, at a Mitt Romney fundraiser was also pretty rare, he hemmed and hawed.
Hey! I just found a quarter! Just $74,999.74 to go!